The Madness of Infertility

I think this is an amazing essay that so accurately describes what it's like to be infertile. The author explains how she's jealous of a panda bear who manged to get pregnant while she and her husband still struggle. It's the best example I've seen of how you can be jealous of ANY pregnant being, even one trapped in a zoo. I also like that the author is in her 20's. So much is written about infertile women in their 30's and 40's that the younger ones tend to get forgotten. One of the final straws with the first doctor we saw was when he told me "You're still young and have plenty of time" during a visit. I later realized that it was the third January in a row we'd had an appointment with him. Just because I have time doesn't mean that I haven't already spent too much time dealing with stupid heads. (For the record the time between first appointment and positive pregnancy test with the new doctor? 4 months.)

And the answer is...

It's a girl. We also got the test results back from the ultrasound and blood work a couple of weeks ago and everything looks good. I also had my cervix checked and everything looked great. My mother spent at least 2 months on bed rest with each of her children due to an incompetent cervix (three months hospitalized with her hips above her heart and unable to get out of bed with the last one) so I was very paranoid about my cervix. I might have high fived Matt about because I'm not like my mother. But it was done with love and appreciation for the time she spent in bed with me and my brothers.

We are super excited and can't wait to meet our little girl. Based on what we've seen in the ultrasounds so far she's definitely energetic and has problems sitting still. The technician today had trouble getting a recording of her heartbeat for more than 3 seconds before she moved again. Only time will tell if she's really the OCD/ADD combo that we're expecting.

Last Chance to Guess - Hopefully

Tomorrow we go in for another ultrasound, and hopefully are able to find out the sex of the baby. I do know someone who had a baby that never cooperated and they had to wait till the baby was born. I'm praying that baby doesn't have a twisted sense of humor, but I'm not holding my breath.

Last week I spent a couple of days with my family in the Bay Area and then a couple of days working in San Francisco. It was good to see everyone, even if the weather was worse than El Nino. I also managed to get out of my dad's house with none of the reserved baby clothes from the basement. If I wanted to I could dress the baby from birth to 12 with nothing but the clothes in the basement, so this was an epic feat. Roughly the equivalent of climbing Everest.

For the most part I'm feeling better. I'm still exhausted and going to bed early, but everything else seems to have calmed down.